Christmas Hallmark Cards Ė Highlander Style!
By Leah Rosenthal
Merry Christmas to Mac from Methos:
Iíve braved the confusion and
crowds of the mall
I havenít a clue what to get Mac, at all
Buying him presents is something I dread
A brand new katana? That Kenny kidís head?
I canít give him hair ties,
heís cut off his hair
He has all the classical music (that square)
A tickle-me-Elmo is simply passť
Try-out gal Immies are his choice, nowadays
So what do I give Mac the Boy
Scout this year?
He doesnít share my love for six-packs of beer
Well, he does like antiques for his home and his shelf
And the most ancient antique I know is myself
So Iíll visit him Christmas
Day and tell him stories
Of long ago battles and epics and glories
And great men and women Iíve met and Iíve known
And neither of us need spend Christmas alone.
A card to Fake Methos from the Real Thing:
You show up out of nowhere
Spouting love and peace like Ghandi
Tell everyone that you are me??
Just keep that old sword handy
Iím flattered that you use my
And laugh, to say the leastó
The two of us are phonies, Ďcause
We both used to be a BeastÖ
Christmas card from Cassandra to Methos
You want to make up for the
This chilly Xmas season
I guess youíre hard up for a date
Or some self-serving reason.
You sent me pretty Xmas cards
With words from some old poet
I think Lord Byron was his nameÖ
Iím druid and you know it
(Originally published in So Speaks the Hero #1)